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Riverside Retreat

Thank you for being interested in Waterfowl and Waterfowl Art. 

This page is a little different. It showcases the little outbuilding found at many a camp in the mountains or along the water. 

We have all used them but did you ever marvel at the variety??

 


Disappearing American Art!
The Outhouse - The Johnnie - The Necessary Room - The Privy
Here are some in our neighborhood!!!


Celebrating the fine selection of individual style and grace of the necessary facilities in the area. What a terrific idea. A tribute to Outdoor Johnnies everywhere.


Here is the Pot and the end of the Rainbow. "Liquid Gold"

*GOOSE FOOT* is dedicated to Waterfowl and Waterfowl Groups! Together we can help each other!


Juniata River Resorts

The Full wrap around deck style Johnnie!!
Full Wrap around Deck!!!

The great two seater for close conversation!!
Is this the ladies room?


The interior of the two seated Johnnie!
Seems as this is perfect, don't the ladies always go together???

White Siding with Port side window.  Small but convenient!
White Siding with Port side window.  Small but convenient!

Full Riverview off the full width Deck!!!
What a view off the full width Deck!!! 

The Sauna style, no window, no ventilation?? Go quick! 
The Sauna style, no window, no ventilation?? Go quick! 

Simple Style, nice earthy color, a Plain Jane!!
Simple Style, nice earthy color, a Plain Jane!!

Low maintenance with natural ventilation, good paint job!
Low maintenance with natural ventilation, good paint job!

Room to spare, needs some new paint though!
Room to spare, needs some new paint though!

Nice neighborhood, terrific style and well kept.
Nice neighborhood, terrific style and well kept. 

Stylish, a little short on windows but there are lights, it is wired!
Stylish, a little short on windows but there are lights, it is wired!

The red barn, simple lines, efficient.
The red barn, simple lines, efficient.

This year it gets a new door - I hope!
This year it gets a new door - I hope!

Texture 1-11 Au-Natural with view of the river. Thermometer on the side.
Texture 1-11 Au-Natural with view of the river. Thermometer on the side.

Pre-built deck and step. Nice lines.
Pre-built deck and step. Nice lines.

Very nice with porch light outside door.
Very nice with porch light outside door.

The Holiday Spirit. Terrific storage too!
The Holiday Spirit. Terrific storage too!


The large Johnnie. Lots of room for reading materials!

Good entrance for the Honeybees. Nothing fancy here.
Good entrance for the Honeybees. Nothing fancy here.


The two door Johnnie - His and Hers? Nice

Fish and Chips! Chipboard construction with Fish cutout window.
Fish and Chips!
Chipboard with fish window!

Paint Me! Simple style but needs new paint job.
Paint Me! Simple style but needs new paint job.

Hunters Paradise - Deer Rack over the door
Hunters Paradise - Deer Rack over the door

The Greenhouse
The Greenhouse
Nice and neat and clean!

Mixed construction. Aluminum siding wood front.
Mixed construction. Aluminum siding wood front. ----->


Nice interior showing bare Aluminum walls. Low Maintenance.

The Little Red Box
The Little Red Box
Simple design - Works Great

The Classic - Tarpaper siding with nice weathered door.
The Classic
Tarpaper siding with nice weathered door.

The Standard no Frills Johnnie in good condition!
The Standard no Frills Johnnie in good condition!

Close to the dining room. Great in bad weather!
Close to the dining room. Great in bad weather!

Lovely colors! Definitely Out Back - watch your step when you leave!
Lovely colors! Definitely Out Back - watch your step when you leave!

The Moonbeam! Works just fine.
The Moonbeam!
Needs work but works!

The Ultra Modern made with Plastic!! Lovely new design for Low maintenance and no painting required.
The Ultra Modern made with Plastic!! Lovely new design for Low maintenance and no painting required.


Suburban Renewal!!

The outdoor shower!
This is not what you think it is. This is an outdoor shower. Nice when you are here for an extended stay and the river water is too cold. Helps keep your friends around you too.


The Ice House


Click Picture for full size image

Ladies Room at Camp in Idaho
York Outfitters

Mens room at Camp in Idaho
York Outfitters

2  more Outhouses in Perry County up in the hills!

A little Poem, from bygone recollections.

As I recall the days of yore is the little house, behind the house,
 with the crescent over the door. 
'Twas a place to sit and ponder with your head bowed down low; 
Knowing that you wouldn't be there, if you didn't have to go. 

Ours was a three-holer, with a size for every one. 
You left there feeling better, after your usual job was done. 
You had to make these frequent trips whether snow, rain, sleet, or fog- 
To the little house where you usually found the Sears-Roebuck catalog. 

Oft times in dead of winter, the seat was covered with snow. 
'Twas then with much reluctance, to the little house you'd go. 
With a swish you'd clear the seat, bend low, with dreadful fear 
You'd blink your eyes and grit your teeth as you settled on your rear. 

I recall the day Granddad, who stayed with us one summer, 
Made a trip to the shanty which proved to be a hummer. 
'Twas the same day my Dad finished painting the kitchen green. 
He'd just cleaned up the mess he'd made with rags and gasoline. 

He tossed the rags in the shanty hole and went on his usual way 
Not knowing that by doing so he would eventually rue the day. 
Now Granddad had an urgent call, I never will forget! 
This trip he made to the little house lingers in my memory yet. 

He sat down on the shanty seat, with both feet on the floor. 
Then filled his pipe with tobacco and struck a match on the outhouse door. 
After the Tobacco began to glow, he slowly raised his rear: 
Tossed the flaming match in the open hole, with not a sign of fear. 

The Blast that followed, I am sure was heard for miles around; 
And there was poor ol' Granddad just sitting on the ground. 
The smoldering pipe was still in his mouth, his suspenders he held tight; 

The celebrated three-holer was blown clear out of sight. 
When we asked him what had happened, his answer I'll never forget. 
He thought it must be something that he had recently et! 

Next day we had a new one which my Dad built with ease. 
With a sign on the entrance door which read: No Smoking, Please! 
Now that's the end of the story, with memories of long ago, 

Of the little house, behind the house where we went cause we had to go!

The Outhouse Poem

The service station trade was slow 
The owner sat around, 
With sharpened knife and cedar stick 
Piled shavings on the ground. 

No modern facilities had they, 
The log across the rill Led to a shack, 
marked His and Hers 
That sat against the hill. 

"Where is the ladies restroom, sir?" 
The owner leaning back, 
Said not a word but whittled on, 
And nodded toward the shack. 

With quickened step she entered there 
But only stayed a minute, 
Until she screamed, just like a snake 
Or spider might be in it. 

With startled look and beet red face 
She bounded through the door, 
And headed quickly for the car 
Just like three gals before. 

She missed the foot log - jumped the stream 
The owner gave a shout, 
As her silk stockings, down at her knees 
Caught on a sassafras sprout. 

She tripped and fell - got up, 
and then In obvious disgust, 
Ran to the car, stepped on the gas, 
And faded in the dust. 

Of course we all desired to know 
What made the gals all do 
The things they did, and then we found 
The whittling owner knew. 

A speaking system he'd devised 
To make the thing complete, 
He tied a speaker on the wall 
Beneath the toilet seat. 

He'd wait until the gals got set 
And then the devilish tike, 
Would stop his whittling long enough, 
To speak into the mike. 

And as she sat, a voice below 
Struck terror, fright and fear, 
"Will you please use the other hole, 
We're painting under here!" 

Pa! Fix the Outhouse

Ma was in the kitchen fiddling around when she hollers out-"Pa! You need to go out and fix the outhouse!" 
Pa replies, "There ain't nuthin wrong with the outhouse." 
Ma yells back, "Yes there is, now git out there and fix it." 
So Pa mosies out to the outhouse, looks around and yells back, "Ma! There ain't nuthin wrong with the outhouse!
"Ma replies, "Stick yur head in the hole!"
Pa yells back, "I ain't stickin my head in that hole!" 
Ma says, "Ya have to stick yur head in the hole to see what to fix."
So with that, Pa sticks his head in the hole, looks around and yells back, "Ma! There ain't nuthin wrong with this outhouse!" Ma hollers back, "Now take your head out of the hole!" 
Pa proceeds to pull his head out of the hole, then starts yelling, "Ma! Help! My beard is stuck in the cracks in the toilet seat!" To which Ma replies, "Hurt's, don't it ?!" 

Tell The Truth

Once there was a little boy who lived in the country. They had to use an outhouse, and the little boy hated it because it was hot in the summer, cold in the winter and stank all the time. The outhouse was sitting on the bank of a creek and the boy determined that one day he would push that outhouse into the creek.

One day after a spring rain, the creek was swollen so the little boy decided today was the day to push the outhouse into the creek. So he got a large stick and started pushing. Finally, the outhouse toppled into the creek and floated away.

That night his dad told him they were going to the woodshed after supper. Knowing that meant a spanking, the little boy asked why.

The dad replied, "Someone pushed the outhouse into the creek today. It was you, wasn't it,son?"

The boy answered yes. Then he thought a moment and said, "Dad, I read in school today that George Washington chopped down a cherry tree and didn't get into trouble because he told the truth."


The dad replied, "Well, son, George Washington's father wasn't in that cherry tree."

 

Pa has found out that the hole under the outhouse is full. He goes into the house and tells Ma that he doesn't know what to do to empty the hole.

Ma says, "Why don't you go ask the young'n down the road? He must be smart 'cause he's a college gradjyate."

So Pa drives down to the neighbor's house and asks him, "Mr. College gradjyate, my outhouse hole is full, and I don't know what to do to empty it."

The young'n tells him, "Get yourself two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. Put them both under the outhouse and light them both at the same time. The first one will go off and shoot the outhouse in the air. While it's in the air the second one will then go off and spread the poop all across your farm, fertilizing your ground.

The outhouse should then come back down to the same spot atop the now-empty hole..."

Pa thanks the neighbor, then drives to the hardware store and picks up two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. He goes home and puts them under the outhouse. He then lights them and runs behind a tree.

All of a sudden, Ma comes running out of the house and into the outhouse!

BOOM! Off goes the first stick of dynamite ... shooting the outhouse into the air. 
BOOM! Off goes the second stick of dynamite ... spreading poop all over the farm.

WHAM! The outhouse comes crashing back down atop the hole.....

Pa races to the outhouse, throws open the door and asks, "Ma, are you all right??!!"

As she pulls up her panties she says...
"Yeah, but I'm sure glad I didn't fart in the kitchen.

 

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